Step 5- Care package guidelines

You've Got Mail! Sending letters and care packages is crucial.

Letters:
I plan on sending my Marine one letter everyday when he's gone, but that's just because we like the movie The Notebook. =] I've heard people say once a week and that's what I did with my last deployment. Personally I don't think it's enough. Let's just say..minimum-once a week, maximum-once a day. You always want to do the minimum though, because there's nothing worse than looking forward to mail day and you're the only soldier who doesn't get mail.

Care packages:
Deciding what to put in them can be hard. You don't always know what they need or want, and you don't want to send the same thing in each one either. During my first deployment, I did send normal ones and I found exactly that. It got boring, there was no surprise element, and I didn't know what to stuff them with. Buuuutttt!... I recently found a website that tells all about care packages. It's a Marine Corps website, but it can be used for any branch of the military. It'll introduces you to "theme care packages." They're so fun and I plan on using these for both of my upcoming deployments. Even if you don't like the idea and decide to do the traditional packages, I would recommend using an idea from one of the theme suggestions. It's sort of like a Day at Home. Have someone take a picture of everything you do in one day and send him things to do with it. Take a picture of you getting out of bed- send him a self-decorated pillowcase. You brushing your teeth- a mini tube of the toothpaste you use. Eating breakfast-a single serving of your cereal. (MY FAVORITE) Mowing the grass-fill a sandwich baggy with lawn clippings (it reminds them of home to smell fresh cut grass.) It just reminds them of home and reminds them you miss them in your everyday life. The website also has a link and information on how to get free boxes (select your size) and shipping labels for the your packages. http://usmcgals.com/carepackages.htm

Phone Calls:
The frequency of the calls and their length will depend on where your soldier is. They'll all have a FOB (the base) but your soldier may not be there very much depending on what they're doing. If they are there a lot, the phone calls will be more frequent and longer (once every 2-3 weeks maybe.) If they are not there, there's really no telling (anywhere from once every 3 weeks to every other month and shorter calls.) Don't get mad if they don't call or if their call gets cut off.

Read more: How to Survive Your Soldier's Deployment | eHow.com http://www.ehow.com/how_5248994_survive-soldiers-deployment.html#ixzz1F5adfnOM

Step 4

The following things go hand in hand: Optimism and Keeping Busy. It's easy to get down in the slumps sometimes, but snap out of it. Keep a positive mentality. He'll come home. He'll be alright and just think of that day. Imagine standing there waiting on the tarmac for his plane to land, finally seeing him, and running to give him the biggest hug you'll ever had in your life. You thought you both were close before- wait until his homecoming day. You'll never be more happier and grateful for life. Think of that and there's no way you won't smile. While you're thinking of your soldier, keep busy. I swear, keeping busy is the key to every deployment. The very reason I came out emotionally destroyed after my first deployment was because I wasn't busy. If you're busy you're more likely to be optimistic and not let yourself fall into self-pity. Yeah, your situation could be better, but it could also be a lot worse. Get involved with every activity that draws you in that has nothing to do with your soldier's deployment. You'll also want to get involved with every activity that has everything to do with your soldier's deployment.

Read more: How to Survive Your Soldier's Deployment | eHow.com http://www.ehow.com/how_5248994_survive-soldiers-deployment.html#ixzz1EoZl2jOm

Step 3

I can tell you I've already cried numerous times, and neither of my guys have even left yet! It's just the thought of the two single most important people in my life leaving and soon that day will come. This is probably the only step that no matter how much you prepare, the result will be the same. I know I'm going to be a wreck for at least two days (probably more) after they both leave and that's expected and fine. So go ahead, cry your heart out but only for a set period. Tell yourself you have one more hour of sulking then you're done. Your soldier always got back up after training at 29 Palms or a hard hit to the ground after a jump at Airborne School. You are your soldier's soldier now. Get back up, stand tall, and look forward to the day he comes home.

Step 2

Obviously you and your soldier are going to be scared. You may want to discuss some of these concerns with your soldier, but don't take it personally if he/she doesn't want to talk about the actual deployment. Maybe your soldier will have no problem with it. It really just depends on what type of person your soldier is, but sometimes it's easier to not think about leaving and enjoy the last few months with family. Also remember that soldiers are trained to be "rough and tough." You'll see it in their eyes before they leave that they're scared and sad to leave you. There's no need to talk in depth about what he/she "might" experience. Don't scare you or your soldier any more than you already are. The only thing they really care about is you telling them how much they mean to you, that you'll be with them through letters and care packages through the deployment, and that you'll be right there waiting when they come back.

Step 1

Discuss any concerns about taking on what could've previously been the soldier's normal duties around the house if you feel you'll have difficulty with them and discuss who could help if a problem should arise (primarily directed to the military spouse.) You may want to ask your soldier for a few contact information of a couple of soldiers (your soldier's friends) living nearby who aren't being deployment with your soldier and who could help in a case of emergency- from a broken faucet (we all know military money can be tight to call a professional out for something so small yet so important) to an emergency on base. Many times soldier's spouses move to the base shortly before a deployment and don't know anyone at all or the friends they have made are also being deployed with your soldier. It's just better to be prepared than not be.

Getting ready to deploy

I found a great article today with some super information about deployment. Please visit the website or wait because every day I will post another suggestion. Please be a follower of my blog!

It's no secret: deployments are difficult for everyone involved. Not only for the soldiers but also for the family left waiting. Whether you are a military wife, military girlfriend, Army mother, Marine sister, Air Force father, Navy brother, or any other significant person in a soldier's life, the difficulties faced on the home front are uniform. I am a Marine Rifleman's girlfriend and an 82nd Airborne Paratrooper's sister. I have gone through one deployment in the past that left me emotionally destroyed. Now I'm getting ready to wait through my brother's and my Marine's simultaneous deployments next month. Going into these two deployments, I keep thinking to myself, "If I only knew before my first deployment what I know now." These next steps will share what I learned from being on the home front during deployment #1 and how to make your upcoming time apart more bearable for both you and your soldier.

Read more: How to Survive Your Soldier's Deployment | eHow.com http://www.ehow.com/how_5248994_survive-soldiers-deployment.html#ixzz1EFOIRCEN

Have you joined JSS?

Please visit the site
http://jointservicessupport.org/Default.aspx
After you register, you will receive all sorts of great information about all different things and what is going on that is available to you and your family through the military. Please join. It only takes a few minutes and most importantly it is secure and with our soldiers, that is TOP priority. Thanks!

OMK- Operation Military Kids

If any of you have ever had any experience with this program you will agree with me that it is TOTALLY awesome!!!!!! They have partnered up with Utah State University Cooperative Extension 4-H here in Utah and offers all sorts of cool things for kids to do. The best part about this is that all the kids are military kids. I firmly believe having someone to talk to in the same situation as you is soooo helpful! Why would it be any different for our kids? Here is the website. http://www.utah4-h.org/htm/omk Most of the fun stuff are held in St. George. They had an amazing summer program last year. Check out the activities. They also promote a program called "Hero Packs". This is a program that fills backpacks for kids affected by military deployment. www.operationmilitarykids.org/public/heropacks.aspx These backpacks are filled with all sorts of stuff from digital cameras, notebooks, pens and picture frames. Fun stuff to help the kids stay in touch with their deployed parent.

Check it out and if any of your organizations are looking for a humanitarian project this is a worthy one.


Again I am sorry if the links aren't working. Just cut and paste.

Iraq and Afghanistan Veterans of America website

This looks to be a good one.
http://iava.org

First Free Treatment- Access to Recovery

I wanted to share an email I received today. This is just an example of what great programs the military has to offer. Please, please, if they apply to you, take advantage of these programs because that is the only way we will have more available to us. -Amanda

Subject: First Free Treatment - Access to Recovery (UNCLASSIFIED)

On behalf of the Utah Division of Substance Abuse and Mental Health and the
Utah National Guard, The Substance Abuse Prevention, Treatment, & Outreach
(PTO) office is pleased to announce the approaching implementation of the
Access to Recovery Grant.

The Access to Recovery Grant (ATR) is a $10.6 million grant that provides
monetary support of all phases of the treatment and recovery process. What
this means is FREE treatment for all Service Members, both Army and Air, the
families of Service Members to include mothers, fathers, sisters, brothers,
teen-age children, and adult sons and daughters!

Anyone who is remotely connected to a Service Member can qualify for this
grant.

The grant currently services clients in Salt Lake County, Weber County, and
Utah County. I am working closely with the implementation team to contract
with providers in Washington County, but as of yet that has not happened.
We will field cases from the Southern Region for alternative plans.

The contracts with the providers are being signed, and we can make referrals
as soon as the 15 FEB 2011.

There has never been a better time to get treatment and counseling services
than now. Military Members and our families go through hard times and are
affected by the disease of addiction.
There is a way out!

Call SFC April Rylander at (801) 432-4943 or e-mail at

april.elise.rylander@us.army.miL

Group of support in Southern Utah

I would like to know if you have a soldier! Please let me know what your military story is. I would also like your contact information if you are interested in going to lunch with some other southern Utah soldier families. Hope to see you soon!

Purpose of Families Left Home

I have been a military wife for almost 16 years. My husband joined the Utah National Guard right after we were married. He is now in Ft. Sill, OK where he is completing his training to become an officer. He attended SUU (Southern Utah University) ROTC program. They have a wonderful program up there. He has until April when he will come home and then head right up north for the unit's annual training. The month of May we will have him home just for a brief moment while he prepares to leave for Indiana in June. He will be deploying overseas for a year. So enough about my situation....
I have a wonderful FRG (Family Readiness Group) Leader. She is so amazing! She has organized and rallied a group of wives, mothers and soldier's significant others. She has created responsibilities and chairpersons over those responsibilities. The battery has a newsletter that is put out every month. They have lunch together every month. I am not able to attend because of the distance so that is one reason I am starting this blog. I would LOVE to get a group of us soldier significant others together and have lunch once a month. This would especially help us through the deployment. It is really nice to have family and friends around to help out but someone in the same situation makes it all so much easier. Kindof like your the top card in a playing card tower being supported by many.
The 2nd reason for starting this blog is information. I have found that just being on the email list of some of the military programs keeps me informed of tons of different things that are available to me. This is the 1st time I have ever felt like I am involved in the military career of my husband. I know its not much but it does make a difference. The United States Military has tons of resources that are available. I thought it would be nice to share those resources and hopefully find out a little bit more about them. I hope the things I find will help "families left home" out there that are feeling really alone while their soldier is gone.